Being possessive in a relationship is a situation where one partner decides to take full control and ownership over the other partner. Without allowing the other person to exercise a bit of freedom.
Being possessive, be all mine, in a relationship is trying to be a little selfish. Trying to limit your partner from some certain rights which the person must have gotten used to in the past. Sometimes people classify it as an act of jealousy. Because you are trying to own something not necessarily all yours.
Yes, it is not all yours, because your partner can choose to quit the relationship if he or she can’t cope with your attitude. He or she is not really all yours because the person you are trying to possess is equally human, and not an asset. Don’t call it being protective, because you are not being cared for but rather being over desirous.
Although, in some circumstance, one of the partners do enjoy the demeanor of being controlled and owned by the other. It might seem to the person a sign of being loved and cherished in the relationship. But until at a certain point, he or she will come to realize that being possessive is not all that healthy as he or she has thought.
It’s not as if being possessive over one’s partner has got any good thing attached to it. In the real sense of it. It shouldn’t be so. Personally, I view it as an act of greediness and selfishness. An act of playing security conscience over your partner. If you are a woman playing the role of possessiveness over your man. Have you reason and ask yourself how it has been with him, or her when you were not yet together in a relationship.
Then if you are a man playing the role of being possessive over your woman. Have you wondered to ask yourself if you actually bought the woman with money?
Like a piece of parcel displayed for sale in the market that has no sense of decision on whom to bid for its price. Besides all this, being possessive only signifies assurance that the livelihood of the person is in your hands
It can be a bad sign in the following ways
It can ruin a relationship
When one partner starts being suspicious over the other person by checking his or her movement. Calling at every short interval to inquire about his or her welfare in the office or when at home. Checking his or her phone messages and calls. Dictating to your partner what to do and what not to do. It doesn’t look fine.
Although the affected partner might get irritated secretly, and still not express his bad feelings. But at a certain point will feel aggravated. But while doing all these, do you wonder to ask yourself or try to observe if actually, your partner is enjoying your game.
Let say you realize that your partner is not enjoying your game, but only lacks the effrontery to voice it out. Then you will understand that you are bound to allow him or her to exercise some control over oneself. Because such things can bring misunderstanding which might lead to dissolving a relationship. Your partner might not like the idea of you checking out his movements. Or checking on his phones or trying to be more authoritative towards him. So, it definitely can be a bad sign.
It can give the other person a timidity nature
When you make it a habit that your partner should stick to your ways and orders. He or she should be accountable to you in everything. Although, some men like it, it does no good to the woman. This is because she won’t feel balanced when in public speaking gatherings or outside the relationship.
Since you have given her the life of being under someone and taking orders from the person. It will be very difficult for her to exercise authority outside, even when allowed to do so, she will feel shy and nervous. It will be difficult for the person to speak in public gatherings because she’s been used to possessiveness.
I recently asked a father of three, a few days ago. Why he always insists on his wife taking orders directly from him before doing anything including accepting gifts from people. He responded by saying that it makes his wife become always submissive and caring.
He might be right, but not exactly. A good wife will definitely be submissive and caring without having to subject her to being over-controlled by you. So, being over-possessive on your partner can be a bad sign because it can bring about being timid in nature.
It can limit freedom
This includes not wanting to see you with some other person who especially is not related to you. As such, each time he or she finds out or sees that her partner is having a discussion or any engagement at all with someone the person immediately becomes jealous and anxious.
It also includes you not having your own decision or trying to bring out an active solution in the union. It’s not best when one partner keeps asking for permission to do certain things in a relationship. Especially those things that needed immediate attention and are very likely to do without the consent of the other.
It gives a sense of Inferiority complex
It can lead to lowliness but the kind that doesn’t worth having. When a partner becomes much possessive over the other person, this situation can lead to the lowliness of that partner not only within the immediate affair but also outside the union. This definitely will turn to inappropriate submissiveness to areas not expected.
Now, how do view it when in public places of gathering, your partner lacks the courage to speak in public. The person finds it difficult to express him or herself or is not even able to bring out suggestions. All these are evidence of what becomes of a partner when he or she is allowed to be possessive by the other partner
It can lead to Violence freedom
This means forceful freedom. When you keep possessing your partner and not allowing her to have her own way. Not allowing her to do things on her own or act or even move out at will. you are indirectly equally calling for trouble but you may not know it. Remember people change. If eventually she gets involved with a friend who can convince her, or she finds out her real worth of freedom. She will by all means strive to escape from your grip.
It leads to limited freedom of authority
Exercising freedom is limited where a partner is having issues of over security. How do I mean? There is this fear of doing things without the consent of the other. There is this nervousness in performing activities that were supposed to perform in the absence of the other person.
So then what happens when the partner dies? That is when the person starts to learn how to become self-reliant without the other person. Things might start going wrong in the sense that what the person doesn’t know how to do might be taught to the person by someone else. Whereas the person was supposed to be doing those things by his or her very self.