What is a toxic girlfriend?
She could be any woman who always makes her man feel uneasy and does not live up to expectations. She may constantly nag and show nuisance traits towards him. Some men may wonder why their girlfriends show toxic behaviors.
This is because women are on the receiving angle. They tend to be under the control of the man. Therefore, when they see or observe the man as not attending to their demands, they try to make him notice.
Spotting out toxicity in a girlfriend may not be easy during the days when the man and the woman are still dating. All because the woman may tend to avoid some character that may damage the relationship. While in some cases the toxicity may not be visible until when the relationship becomes older.
The woman might be tricky at the initial stage of courtship and decide not to show toxic traits. However, that does not make the man feel all is all right. Some men might decide to act indifferently to spot the bad character.
Some other times it can get confusing but from the signs below you can understand.
She is more demanding
Maybe you so much love her and want to make her the best. At first, you may heed those demands. It is natural if the woman makes financial demands because she is under the man. This demand could be normal if it is on an occasional basis. But when it becomes more often, it is a sign of toxic behavior. The constant demand from a girl could mean not being serious about the relationship you both share.
She rarely or does not give at all
The act of giving is a way of showing love and this love bears all things. Even if your girlfriend does not have any means of earning she can at least give the little she has. The little she gives shows she cares for you and it can make the man happy. A woman who hardly gives or does not give at all can be boring, annoying and a sign she is never interested in your needs.
She always recalls past mistakes
Each time you have a little disagreement with her she quickly reminds you of your ugly past. She keeps reminding you of how you treated her badly and she might take revenge. Such a woman may be the unforgiving type. This can make the man uneasy because his girlfriend may one day take vengeance.
She takes your concerns for granted
When your girlfriend hardly cares about your worries and resentment then it is time you start spotting signs of toxicity. It could worsen when for instance you present a problem and seeks her opinion. Now rather than get some advice or counsel you get a rebuke in return.
She never admits faults
It is always your fault. She never believes she could make mistakes. Each time you spot her mistake, she argues it sternly and proves herself right. She would rather find ways of defending her action than admit to her fault.
She is manipulative
She is never sincere in anything she does. She would always devise a means of getting what she wants from you. For instance, if she wants to get some amount of money from you she would pretend to be sick. She would do anything tricky to have her way with you.
She wants to be first and always
It is always her opinion and not yours. She would always want you to treat her problems first before yours. She prefers to come to be given the first treatment in everything about your relationship. She would want you to put her preferences first before any other.
Both of you seem always to disagree
You are never in an agreement on any issues about your relationship. Even when you try to make her agree with you, she would rather it bring quarrel and unending conflict. She prefers every problem be settled in her favor.
She is not emotionally supportive
In times of distress or some issues that might seem to weigh your emotions down. At this time, you may need comfort from someone loving. Someone who could help you calm down your nerves your girlfriend could be the one but she prefers you sort things out yourself. She cares less.
Being overly aggressive
A relationship coach once told me that it is not suiting for a woman to be hostile because men may resist her friendship. However, aggressiveness comes as a weakness but there is a possibility to overcome it. But when it becomes visible in a relationship it becomes a toxic trait.
She constantly nags
If your girlfriend finds every reason to nag or constantly does so. sometimes it might not be necessary because she is fond of doing so. Even when the issue is a minor one, she still prefers to sound the trumpet. This is a sign of being toxic
She is not honest
She never says one thing and sticks to it. She may say one thing now and profess it as the truth but the next moment she is saying a different thing. It spells lies, lies, and lies. In most cases she may deny saying any such thing as the one she said initially. She may even allege you said something that you never said.
You are the only attention
When you are the only one, she clings to and refuses to associate with other people. She only wants to be with you alone and at all times. She hardly moves out without having you to company her. She sits where you sit, stands where you stand, and only has a conversation with you. This attitude is toxic.
She is always on the lookout for your movement. She monitors you and knows where you go and the kind of friends you keep. She even spies and checks your phones periodically. She is always curious to know the relationship you have with other people.
She is never grateful
She is never thankful for anything at all be it big or small. It is always difficult for her to praise your good deeds, or compliment you for any gift. She would rather say that you were supposed to do it or that is your job therefore no need for compliments.
How to Stop it
A male partner who notices any of these signs from his girlfriend could simply find a means of calling her to attention. Do it in a loving way that does not spell embracement or insult. For instance, if she is always demanding you could simply ask her.
Do you want us to keep spending more than what we earn? Then go ahead to tell her the implication of making more expenses than income. In the end state to her that you cannot continue responding to much of her demands. Make sure to do it in a caring way.